Benji Left our lifes
I’ve just been diagonised with bronchities today and the doctor insisted me to start on anti-botics and I had no choice but to start a 5 day course to prevent furthur infection of my chest….
The worst nightmare of us haunt me still badly which was last mid-night. Benji was in the most terrible shape at 10pm and in tears, we looked for the 24 hours Mount Pleasant hospital, and Daddy drove us all there. With Benji in our arms at his last breath.
He collasped once in the evening in my parents room, and grasp for air, his eyes almost fainted. That was when we made our decision to let him go, to ease his pain (so they said, but to unease our pain) forever.
In our last journey inside the car trip to the hospital with him, he laid on my arms when he thought he couldn’t held on, then at certain moments, he opened his eyes to look out of the window, trying to have his last look.
The hospital was empty except us, after Mummy and Daddy registered for Benji to be put to sleep, We stayed with him a more 20 mins…. seeing him still trying to grasp for air badly and watching us weapt. He knew. He couldn’t walk any longer.
I supposed at the crying and crying of me and mummy, he jumped off the chair and our arms while we were carrying him and walked out of the hospital to the garden for a stroll with darling AK and Daddy. There he stood still unable to actually walk and stood looking and grasping for the last breath.
At my dog’s final moment, our last words to him, our tears and sobs and hugs and kisses, he walked into the clinic.. ignoring us already into the hospital area. He sniffed a slight while before he collapsed and laid onto the ground.
That was our last moment with Benji.
We couldn’t ask for more i guess. To have him longer with us is to have seeing him in more pain and heartpain, yet to have him no longer with us is also to be in pain and heartpain.
For now, i can’t ..let go yet.
Goodbye Benji Boy..